I see two possibilities for the fact that I am still alone after all these years.
1. There is actually nobody out there.
2. They are out there but unable to communicate.
Considering the fact that the earth has over 7 billion inhabitants, I must conclude that the problem is the inability to communicate.
That’s OK. Even though the technical ability to communicate has increased a million-fold with the invention of the internet and our always connected devices right in our pockets 24 hours a day, we have lost an equal ability to communicate due to the decrease of actual social interaction. The net result is actually negative. We speak but we don’t understand what we are saying or know what to say at all.
I am going to make it easy for you to contact me so we don’t have to be alone forever. Please fill in the blanks on the following letter and send it to me:
My name is _________ and I am as chronically lonely as you are. I never had any friends when I was a kid and continue to live a solitary life. I am ______ years old and live in __________________. I have read all of your blog and feel that we are twins where were split at birth.
I love technology and TV but can’t stand crowds either. I don’t drink or smoke. That’s stupid. My favorite thing to do in the summer is get naked and go swimming. In the winter I love to sit by the fireplace and watch movies or spend hours in the hot tub on a freezing night. During the comfortable months of the year I would love to play golf, go scuba diving and exploring. I can’t stand watching sports either and would love to join the community band with you. I play the __________.
I am in desperate need of a good friend with benefits to help me through those times of emptiness and desire. I would love to be your BFF and stick with you for the rest of our lives. I appreciate the commitment of marriage but I have no interest in that either. All I need is a good friend and I will be set for life.
Please feel free to email me as much as possible at the following address: _______________. There is no reason we must be alone in a world so full of people.