They say that in space, nobody can hear you scream.
When you are alone and sick. Nobody can help you. I just got over some kind of flu. There was a time when I felt so bad I would die. I even left the front door unlocked so someone could easily find my body. I hoped that someone would break in to rob my house so I could ask them to bring me a glass of water. I would gladly have given them my brand new 65 inch TV and whatever else they wanted.
It’s bad enough being alone all the time. It’s much worse when you are sick and have nobody to care. I called my supervisor at work to tell him I would be out and asked if there was any way he could bring me some medication and something to eat. He said he could stop by on the way home five hours later. I could have been dead by then. Thanks for nothing. Fortunately I felt better by then and told him to forget about it. I wouldn’t want him to waste his time on me.
I probably could have called my mom but she is 83 and doesn’t like to drive across town and I didn’t want her risking her life on my account.
It is just the way one has to live with chronic loneliness. You just have to accept that you could get sick and die or maybe just choke to death on your frozen pizza. The cat will just stare at you while you pass away, eat your pizza then eat your face.
I’m feeling a bit angry right now.