He might be naked!!!

Privacy in the suburban wasteland is difficult to come by.  As a nudist, privacy becomes very important.

Personally, I don’t care if people see me naked in the back yard.  I just worry that if those people happen to be, and most likely are, regular people, then they might freak out.  I don’t need neighbors to freak out.

I’ve planted shrubbery in strategic locations to try to screen my yard from second story windows but it is still a few years away from being a good screen.  In the meantime, the idea of having to put on clothes to go out in the yard, swim, or use the hot tub really sucks.  Therefore I am at least partially careful about offending.  Otherwise, when it’s 100 degrees and high humidity, I’m going naked whether anyone likes it or not.

It hasn’t been obvious yet that my happiness has been observed until recently.  It was cold outside so I wasn’t naked.  I walked outside to clean up the patio.  The neighbors across the back fence were outside playing with their little girl.  The girl, as little girls do, play very loudly.  I could hear every word she yelled at the top of her lungs.  One phrase she said was, “Don’t look over there, he might be naked!”

Apparently at one time I was the topic of conversation in the house.  Part of me is glad to hear that they know and have not called the police or something.  Part of me is sad to hear that seeing naked people is “bad” for them.  What a wonderful world it would be if we could all just be naked and not worry about it.

These people usually keep their 2nd story window blinds closed in which case I feel free.  I guess they peep.  That’s not my fault.  It’s not like I’m being lewd.  I’m just being comfortable.  If they want to peep.  I’m fine with that.

It’s January now and I’m really looking forward to swimming weather again.

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Sleep Naked

I’ve been sleeping naked for countless years now.  There’s no doubt about it that it is so much more comfortable.

Last night it was really cold so I thought I might wear my pajamas.  Big mistake.  They kept getting all bunched up.  The pants legs kept riding up.  Strangely enough, I kept feeling cold and didn’t sleep well.

Finally I got up, stripped down and got back in bed.  So much better.  I was actually warmer because my body heat was allowed to warm the bed around me.

It made me think about all the regular people who don’t sleep naked.  I almost cried for them.  Can you even believe that people wear clothing to bed?  It boggles my mind.  Why?  What’s the point?  I’ll never understand the common humans.  They don’t know what is good.  Maybe they will never know what is good.

Want to make your life better?   Sleep naked.  Encourage your kids to sleep naked.  If they grow up doing it wrong then then how will they ever get a good night’s sleep?   I spent my childhood sweating and losing countless nights of sleep until I figured it out.  I could have done so much better in school had I been properly rested.

I’m trying to help you.  I’m trying to help the world.  Pay attention!

 

Trip Report – Nude Beach Corpus Christi

San Antonio sucks and circumstances came together yesterday so I decided to set off on a spontaneous road trip to get some beach time.  I haven’t really gone anywhere special in a very long time so the time was ripe for a getaway.  There’s a spot that I’ve been looking to check out for a few years but never took the time.  It’s just a little south of Corpus Christi on Padre Island.

I gathered a few supplies together and hit the road.  It took me about 3 hours to get there from San Antonio.  After a quick stop at Subway for a 6″ veggie delight is made my way to the beach.  Traffic was a little heavy since half of the world was going to the beach on Saturday.

Google photo. Forgot to take a picture. New bollards are much larger.

The area is at the boundry of the regular beach and Padre Island National Seashore park.  Bollards are set up in the sand to prevent anyone from driving on that part of the beach.  That effectively cuts off access to the riff-raff.  Park right there.

I brought along my bicycle so I could easily travel a nice distances from the common people who don’t appreciate speedos or nudity for unfathomable reasons.

It was hot but the humid wind coming off the ocean kept it bearable.

I loaded up my bike with water, towel and sunscreen and set off down the empty beach.  At the start there were a few people brave enough to wander more than 10 feet from their car.


About half a mile I ran across one guy on a lawn chair still wearing clothes.  Weird.

At maybe around a mile I was completely alone with nobody as far as the eye can see.  This is special!  One is seldom alone anymore in this crowded world.

There was nothing but beach, sun, and birds to keep me company.  Nice!

I had planned to just get a nice speedo tan this year but how could one resist.  It was a matter of minutes before I found myself naked.

I applied sunscreen and played in the water and the sand for a while.  This is the best thing ever.  I wished I had brought my frisbee to toss into the wind and catch it when it comes back.

Occasionally the park ranger would drive past in his four wheeler.  You could see him coming way in advance.  I either put on my swimsuit or sat in the water and waved.  It would seem unnecessary for him to tell me to get un-naked with nobody else around but best not to push it.  If I was there with a group I might have risked it.  I doubt he would have really cared.

 

After a while I thought I might ride my bike a little further down just to see what there was to see.

Naked bike riding is fun.  I highly recommend you give it a chance.

 

Eventually three hours had passed as I frolicked around.  It was nearing 4:00 so I decided to head back to the car.  I was glad I brought my water.  I was getting rather thirsty.  Love my Yeti cup!  Keeps Ice forever!

I loaded up my car and hit the road for Port Aransas to visit the best restaurant in the world.

If you’re ever in Port Aransas, eat at The Crazy Cajun.  I’ve been going there since I was in school.  They opened in 1980 something and I’m glad to see they’re still there.

 

They have lots of cajun food but you HAVE to get The Hungry Cajun.  For about $16.00 you get corn, sausage, shrimp, potatoes and crab.

MMMMMMMMMM!  The best.

Do it!  Do it now!

 

After dinner I like to go down to the marina and watch the boats come in as the sun sets.

There was a nice little wooden floating covered patio where I spent at least an hour looking at all the boats come and go.

 

 

I considered sitting on the edge and dangling my feet in the water but as I looked down a Sea Turtle was picking algae off the side of the patio.  That would not have been good for my toes.

 

 

The marina is full of all kinds of boats.  I looked at some of the sailboats and imagined myself sailing the Caribbean going wherever I pleased.

Note to self:  Watch YouTube and learn how to sail in case you ever decide to steal a sailboat.

 

 

The sun was setting and I lost my shade so I decided to head to the hotel.

I braved the long line at the ferry and made my way back to the mainland to my motel.  I recommend the Best Western at Ingleside and was lucky that I made my reservation online this morning.  The world is booked up.

I slept well and woke up around 7:00 for the condimental breakfast then headed back up the highway to Mundania.

All in all, it was an inexpensive and enjoyable getaway.  I must do this more often.  Now that I know of a great place to enjoy the beach naked I will do it for sure.  I wish I didn’t always have to do it alone.

Also: Sunscreen is amazing.  Three hours in the direct sun and I didn’t get burned.  I’m impressed.

 

 

Beach Trip!

I woke up early this Saturday morning to a strange buzzing sound.  After walking around the dark house and out in the yard I discovered my neighbor’s air conditioner to be making a horrible racket.  A very loud buzz that can drive a man insane in a few minutes.

Maybe it would be a good day to get the fuck out of town.  I haven’t really gone anywhere in who knows how long.  I spend most of my weekends puttering around the house which is perfectly fine to me because being at home is like being on vacation.

Today I’m feeling like I want go get some sun and water and run around in my speedo or naked.  I decided a spontaneous trip to Corpus Christi and Port Aransas might be in order.  I went online and booked a hotel.  I could have driven there and back in one day but why push it.  Sleeping in a hotel is part of the fun.  It’s a cheap trip.  The hotel, gas and food should cost me less than $200.  Totally worth it at twice the price.

I plan on taking my bike and riding down a blocked off part of the beach where cars aren’t allowed.  I’ll wear my little red speedo and maybe go naked if the beach is deserted.  What fun!

Yes. I’m going alone.  I have two people who I could ask but one would just not appreciate the awesomeness and the other can’t stay overnight.

That’s fine.  I prefer do do as I please and not be encumbered by dragging someone along who is only partially self-aware.

This should be a nice get-away.  Look for the trip report tomorrow.

 

Properly watching Naked and Afraid

I occasionally watch Naked and Afraid on the Discovery Channel.  I’m not a huge fan but if there’s nothing else on, I’ll watch it.  Of course one should be naked while watching so I hope you’re doing it right.

I’m doubt I have the survival skills to last the whole time in such harsh environments.  Still, it might be fun to try it for fun.  I wonder if people get together in groups and go out in the wild and pretend to be on the show.  I would do it.  Too bad I have nobody to go with.  Anyone???

 

World Naked Gardening Day

Today is World Naked Gardening Day.  Unfortunately due to the lack of privacy I was only able to garden mostly naked.  I just wore my tiniest speedos.  One day, as soon as I move to the country, I will be able to garden naked every day.

In a better world, every day would be naked gardening day.

 

Land Shopping Again

The Size of an Acre

Today I went land shopping in the country again.  Still looking for that elusive piece of the American Dream that is good enough to live on for the rest of my life.

There were three areas I planned to look at today.  The first was my first choice from what I saw on the internet.  It was 2 acres.  This was the first time I found 2 acres that was relatively flat so I could really get a feeling for the size.  The back side of it was a small ravine area that was not really build-able.  The left side had a small swamp and a rather large dip where I would have wanted to build my garage/workshop.

I walked around through the high weeds.  There was obviously a singlewide trailer on the spot so there must be electricity, water and a septic tank.  I was unable to find evidence of any.  They must be there below the ground hidden in the weeds.  Having those things readily available would make building there much cheaper and easier.  The land was square enough and was almost private enough to live naked due to the growth of trees along the front fence line and a large treed buffer between neighboring land.  Still… I was not feeling that this was the place I want to die.  It could be made excellent with work.  I’ll keep it on top of my possibility list and hope it stays on the market for a long time.

I drove the 20 miles to the nearby town for lunch.  It was a little further out than I would really like.  I think a 5-15 mile drive would be more acceptable.

I looked at the distance to my next spot.  It was 30 miles from town.  Even further.  I decided not to bother.  I don’t want to have to drive 60 miles round-trip to get something from the hardware store.  30 is acceptable.

I moved on to the third choice.  It was on the way home about 15 miles from town.  Nice drive.  Not too long.  Unfortunately it was in a more developed neighborhood and only 1.3 acres.  Too many ravines as well.  It was fairly private but not rural enough.  Mark that one off.

The trip wasn’t a total waste.  I learned a few things:

  1. Two acres would be OK if perfectly flat and private.  Four would be better though.  One will not work.
  2. Distance matters.  A short drive (<15 mi) one way is enjoyable.  Longer than that and it becomes tedious.
  3. I saw a church in an area that I like.  I might call them up and see if I can post a Land Wanted ad in their newsletter.  Surely there’s some old people in the congregation who will sell me a few acres and make some money.  I could offer a year of free handyman service and expert computer support to sweeten the deal.
  4. Keep trying.  Don’t give up.  Don’t get discouraged.  I still have time.
  5. Road trip!!!