It’s another weekend where I have time to rest and think about how empty my life is. I’m not saying that work makes my life better but it certainly helps take my mind of the other mundanities of life.
I usually spend the weekend at home alone because I have nowhere else to go and nobody to spend any time with. My thoughts drift to wondering if there is anyone out there for me. I can sometime spend hours rehashing my thoughts and trying to make sense of my loneliness. You might think it was simple but it is rather complex. Maybe it’s simple for normal people but I’m far from normal.
If I really boil it down until the only the essence is left, I think it is just plain hornyness. What happens to the brain of a 49 year old man who is still a virgin? You can bet it’s pretty screwed up in a literal sense. In the end, all I want is someone to touch me. It doesn’t seem like too much to ask, does it? What kind of world is this where touching is so prohibited.
Finally, after hours of mental anguish, I end up masturbating and then all is well with the world. I think I should probably do that early in the morning and cut out the wasted time but being horny is kind of fun on it’s own. It’s just the lack of an outlet that makes it suck so much. If there is such a thing as reincarnation, I sure hope it is on a planet where sex and the human body is not such a taboo.
I’m pretty sure that all neighbors are crazy. I’ve watched them all my life and there’s no doubt that they are all insane.
I am currently surrounded by crazy people. The house across the street has a family of black people who have 5 cars and come and go constantly. Every time I go out into my yard I see them either pull up, drive away or just sit in the car with the engine running for an hour or more. So how many times to they come and go when I’m not looking? Do they buy their potato chips one chip at a time? Where the hell are they going all the time?
My neighbors right next door are renters. They pretty much ignore me completely. If I’m lucky I might make some small talk but otherwise I might not exist. Have they no idea what awesomeness lives right next door?
I can go on and on but I’ll keep it short. Having a crazy President doesn’t help.
I think, perhaps, people are crazy all over. When I was young, I came to the conclusion that people are dumb because they think they are smart. This theory may still have some value. As closed-minded as we have become these days, our ideas are all we have and therefore must be the Truth. (Capital T in truth because when we decide for ourselves that something is true then there can be no other truth no matter what.)
Maybe people are crazy because they are just trying to cope with pointless existence. They are doing the best they can to avoid the monotony of a dreary daily life with nothing to look forward to.
Maybe the observers are the crazy ones. We might think that others are crazy because they don’t conform to the standards of our own truth.
Craziness has exploded in recent years. I think it started around the year 2000. It was at that time when everything special had already been done and oppressive mundanity forced us to go to extremes to make life livable. The internet became a major medium allowing crazy extremism to spread like wildfire until we were all infected. So far, no antidote seems to be available and there’s no doubt that craziness is exponential. I wonder what it will be like in just another ten years. If the aliens don’t come soon then we are sure to destroy ourselves.
I guess I’m not one to lodge complaints about crazy people. My attempts to cope with life has left me as crazy as a soup sandwich. I’m sure my neighbors think I’ve completely lost it. Here’s a guy who runs around naked, showers in his backyard, keeps his house and yard nice, builds TARDISes in his garage, is still a virgin at 49, has no friends, lives alone with a cat, wears short shorts and speedos, drives a Prius and has a lot of money.
Boobity boobity boo! I’m probably crazier than you!
Last year I bought a 1500w Xantrex inverter for my RV. At most I expected to run my microwave. I was testing it out when POP! The power went out. This inverter has a surge current rating of 2000W and microwaves don’t use that much power. Still. It couldn’t handle it. I was sad. I expected better from Xantrex.
Not knowing what to do I just let it be. This year I decided I would try some exploratory surgery and see what happened. What could I hurt? It was already dead. Maybe it was just a fuse or something.
Fortunately it wasn’t too hard to open up. A few screws on the ends and pull out the bottom plate.
Taking the circuit board out would be difficult so I hoped that would not be necessary. There were a bunch of fuses which I was getting ready to test first.
I noticed right away that a capacitor had completely blown up. There were cap guts all over. It seemed unlikely that JUST replacing this capacitor would fix the whole thing but what the heck. I looked through my parts bins and found an exact replacement. A 100 uF electrolytic. It was used and had short leads but it was on hand.
The remaining plates sticking up wouldn’t hold solder so I had to remove the rubber base and trim down the plates to the leads. I still didn’t want to take out the whole circuit board so I decided to just solder onto the existing topside leads.
I added some short wires to replace the missing capacitor leads and soldered it in place. I was lucky. The positive side was marked on the circuit board.
It isn’t pretty but it will be perfectly fine if it works. No big loss if not.
I buttoned it back up and connected it to my battery. No FAULT light! Promising! I grabbed a nearby fan and plugged it in to the 120V outlet. The fan spun to life! SUCCESS!!!!! I just saved myself a few hundred bucks buying a new inverter.
Damn I’m awesome! You would think women would be all over me. If only they knew.
I walked out into the backyard to turn off the swimming pool pump when I noticed something colorful on the ground. It was a small parakeet lying face down in the grass. I thought maybe it had run into something and knocked itself out. Birds sometimes do that on the windows of my house. This one was pretty far from the house though. It was strange to see such a colorful bird in a world of crows and sparrows.
I reached down and picked it up. It’s wings were outstretched. It was pretty weak but was able to grab on to my finger and still able to stand up on it’s own. I set him on the picnic table to see what was going on. I gave him a little container of water. He was barely able to stand and tried to fly but didn’t get far.
I picked him up again and folded his wings and held him in my hand. He was getting weaker by the second. I hoped if he was going to die that he would not suffer much longer. I held him and stroked his head gently. Soon he was unable to hold up his head. His eyes were blinking strangely. I could see him breathing quickly. I stayed with him for a few more minutes until his whole body stretched out. He then relaxed and he stopped breathing. I knew he was gone. I closed his eyes. I held him a little longer. I had dug a small hole in the flowerbed a few days earlier to get some dirt. The hole was the perfect size for him so I laid him to rest.
This is the second time I’ve been with a bird as they passed away and I was honored to be there with them at the end. I can only hope that someone will be with me when my time comes. I’m pretty sure I will die alone. I’m glad that at least not everybody has to.
I found myself on Mars with an acquaintance. I knew it wasn’t the moon but it was even closer to the Earth than the moon is. We could see Africa and I recognized the Sahara Desert.
As we wandered around we came upon what looked like a bunch of dead people. There was a group of emaciated bodies sitting in a circle. Their eyes were open but they didn’t move. Their skin was burned and shiny so I was sure they were dead. As I got closer they started moving. They had been sitting there so long that they were not even seeing anymore. Our presence snapped them out of their trance.
We told them about how our spacecraft lifted off by itself after we got out. We were stranded there just like them.
I usually go out for lunch on weekdays. Mostly to get away from the office and also because a man needs food. It is suddenly getting very hard to eat lunch for less than $10.00.
I think Subway is the only place I can go to get a meal for under $10. Schlotzkey’s (another sandwich shop) costs $10.03. The price of the sandwich looks great at $5.79 but if you want a small back of chips and a small drink it suddenly doubles the price.
Many dining and buffet restaurants easily cost more than $10 plus a tip. I usually just get water. I guess water is the way to go nowadays to fight the inflation a little. At the end of the month, I have usually spent $250 just on lunch. Not that I can’t afford it but it’s the principle. That means I spend $3,000 a year just on rushed lunches. Holy Guacamole!
I remember, only around ten years ago, I could easily lunch out for around $5.00. I even kept a lunch log for a year or more. I wish I still had it to compare. Project forward another ten years and we will expect to spend $15-20 on a burger and fries. Especially if the $15.00 per hour minimum wage becomes a thing. Can you imagine? Even those getting $15.00 an hour won’t be able to afford lunch.
Somebody needs to hit the reset switch. Set prices and wages back where they should be and let’s start over. Just divide everything by 10 and only the number change. You will have 10 times less money in your bank account but it will still buy the same amount of stuff. Elect me as your supreme leader and I’ll take care of it.
I plan on bringing my lunch at least twice a week now. Not only will I save $960 I will be eating healthier. Unfortunately it will be less satisfying. All food tastes better when somebody else makes it. I guess I’ll get used to it. It’s all for the best.
San Antonio sucks and circumstances came together yesterday so I decided to set off on a spontaneous road trip to get some beach time. I haven’t really gone anywhere special in a very long time so the time was ripe for a getaway. There’s a spot that I’ve been looking to check out for a few years but never took the time. It’s just a little south of Corpus Christi on Padre Island.
I gathered a few supplies together and hit the road. It took me about 3 hours to get there from San Antonio. After a quick stop at Subway for a 6″ veggie delight is made my way to the beach. Traffic was a little heavy since half of the world was going to the beach on Saturday.
The area is at the boundry of the regular beach and Padre Island National Seashore park. Bollards are set up in the sand to prevent anyone from driving on that part of the beach. That effectively cuts off access to the riff-raff. Park right there.
I brought along my bicycle so I could easily travel a nice distances from the common people who don’t appreciate speedos or nudity for unfathomable reasons.
It was hot but the humid wind coming off the ocean kept it bearable.
I loaded up my bike with water, towel and sunscreen and set off down the empty beach. At the start there were a few people brave enough to wander more than 10 feet from their car.
About half a mile I ran across one guy on a lawn chair still wearing clothes. Weird.
At maybe around a mile I was completely alone with nobody as far as the eye can see. This is special! One is seldom alone anymore in this crowded world.
There was nothing but beach, sun, and birds to keep me company. Nice!
I had planned to just get a nice speedo tan this year but how could one resist. It was a matter of minutes before I found myself naked.
I applied sunscreen and played in the water and the sand for a while. This is the best thing ever. I wished I had brought my frisbee to toss into the wind and catch it when it comes back.
Occasionally the park ranger would drive past in his four wheeler. You could see him coming way in advance. I either put on my swimsuit or sat in the water and waved. It would seem unnecessary for him to tell me to get un-naked with nobody else around but best not to push it. If I was there with a group I might have risked it. I doubt he would have really cared.
After a while I thought I might ride my bike a little further down just to see what there was to see.
Naked bike riding is fun. I highly recommend you give it a chance.
Eventually three hours had passed as I frolicked around. It was nearing 4:00 so I decided to head back to the car. I was glad I brought my water. I was getting rather thirsty. Love my Yeti cup! Keeps Ice forever!
I loaded up my car and hit the road for Port Aransas to visit the best restaurant in the world.
If you’re ever in Port Aransas, eat at The Crazy Cajun. I’ve been going there since I was in school. They opened in 1980 something and I’m glad to see they’re still there.
They have lots of cajun food but you HAVE to get The Hungry Cajun. For about $16.00 you get corn, sausage, shrimp, potatoes and crab.
MMMMMMMMMM! The best.
Do it! Do it now!
After dinner I like to go down to the marina and watch the boats come in as the sun sets.
There was a nice little wooden floating covered patio where I spent at least an hour looking at all the boats come and go.
I considered sitting on the edge and dangling my feet in the water but as I looked down a Sea Turtle was picking algae off the side of the patio. That would not have been good for my toes.
The marina is full of all kinds of boats. I looked at some of the sailboats and imagined myself sailing the Caribbean going wherever I pleased.
Note to self: Watch YouTube and learn how to sail in case you ever decide to steal a sailboat.
The sun was setting and I lost my shade so I decided to head to the hotel.
I braved the long line at the ferry and made my way back to the mainland to my motel. I recommend the Best Western at Ingleside and was lucky that I made my reservation online this morning. The world is booked up.
I slept well and woke up around 7:00 for the condimental breakfast then headed back up the highway to Mundania.
All in all, it was an inexpensive and enjoyable getaway. I must do this more often. Now that I know of a great place to enjoy the beach naked I will do it for sure. I wish I didn’t always have to do it alone.
Also: Sunscreen is amazing. Three hours in the direct sun and I didn’t get burned. I’m impressed.